Photo by: Kristina Flour, Unsplash

Secret Single Behaviour

Shhhh….We all have a side of ourselves that we don’t want others to see…where “others” in this instance, refers to anybody you’ve ever dated or are currently dating. Carrie Bradshaw called it her SSB or Secret Single Behavior. She would stack saltines, put grape jelly on them and then she would eat them standing up in her kitchen, all while reading the latest issue of Vogue. 

For me, however, I suck at dating! I even “caught” the bouquet at my cousin’s wedding last July and still….nothing. So my SSB has become pretty much my way of life. And I’m not sure that that is such a bad thing. I am learning that the more I settle into my me-ness or rather the little idiosyncrasies I’ve developed over my thirty*cough* years on this earth, the happier I am becoming.

All The Single Ladies

Can you relate? Do you have any SSB? Okay, I’ll go first and share a bit about my own SSB — I am addicted to Bejeweled Blitz and when I get home from work, I play a game or five to decompress from the work day. I take a special pleasure in being top of the leader board. And I cheer for my own damn self when I do it too.

And sometimes when I cook, I eat the meal straight out of whatever pot I cooked it in…because less dishes to wash. No shame in my less-dishes-to-wash game. And if I am doing laundry, you better believe that everything goes in the wash, including whatever I am wearing at the time.

Yep, that means walking around naked until the laundry is done. Easy to do when you’re doing said walking in the apartment you are paying for with your own money. A quick win that is twofold – one chore less on my to-do list and no clothes in the basket to wash.

Hey, another thing I’ve learned in this time alone is how to laugh at myself. Seriously…who writes about their secret single behaviour and thus, renders their behaviour not-so-secret anymore?

Now it’s your turn to spill some tea:What’s your SSB? Please share in the comments below and I promise no judgement. 


Happy Father’s Day.

I sat down to write today’s post, but three glasses of red wine later…still nothing.

I eventually went through some of my older posts written on Father’s Day for some spark of inspiration, but all that got me was a walk down memory lane.

It feels weird that after all this time, I cannot bring myself to write any words of anything today. I acknowledge that I know some great fathers and men I have the utmost respect for…but when it comes to saying anything beyond the trite: Happy Father’s Day…I have nothing.

Squat. Nada. No mas.


So instead I will talk about the word, Languid. 

  1. “his languid demeanour irritated her”
    synonyms: relaxed, unhurried, languorous, unenergetic, lacking in energy, slow, slow-moving
  2. weak or faint from illness or fatigue.
    “she was pale, languid, and weak, as if she had delivered a child”
    synonyms: sickly, weak, faint, feeble, frail, delicate, debilitated, flagging, drooping;

After three glasses of wine, the word that comes to mind is languid. I have absolutely no energy to do anything other than float. Float on dreams of what was, what could have been and what will never be. Or is it, what is to come?

I’m not sure, I’m feeling languid.

I wrote a post about Fathers and Daughters four years ago, you should read it. Because it is as true today as it ever was. This walk down memory lane was a reminder that more things change, the more they remain the same. While I continue to grow into the woman I’m supposed to be, and along the way that meant changing my mind, opinions and the way I approached or did things.

The feelings for and about my father…those remain the same. And at this point, that’s okay.


Rainy Days, Slow Coffee Chemex

Rainy Days, Slow Coffee

Here in Trinidad we get two seasons: Rainy and Dry. We are into our rainy season now and for a pluviophile like myself, this time of the year is my absolute favourite. Because rainy days were just made for slow starts, extra snuggles under warm covers and slow coffee. Guess what, you guys? It’s raining again today.

So join me is a go-slow Saturday, let’s have some recreational coffee, come in for a slow pour over while we catch up. Like I said it’s been a wet week here on my island in the Caribbean. We had a public holiday on Thursday and we have another one again on Monday. So this is long weekend for me.

Fun fact about my easy-going island home, we have one of the highest number of public holidays in the world. We have 18 holidays per year…but we waaay behind Sri Lanka. They enjoy 25 public holidays! In this month of June, we have three holidays, which means four-day work weeks for 3 consecutive weeks.

If we were having coffee, I would tell you that the downside of short work-weeks is that you end having to make up for the lost day and that usually means one work day can feel like two or a whole month. And unfortunately Friday felt like a month. So today, feels like an extra special lazy day.

Lazy Days And Travel Stories

This week I shared a bit about some of my adventures on my trip to London. I talked about exploring Bath and how much of good time I had in just a few short hours. I have been craving a jet fuel fix lately and what keeps me sane, are those travel memories and the ones I plan on making later on this year.

The funny thing about that London trip is that it has taken me this long to post anything about it. I had such an amazing time and I felt like I truly met myself on that trip. It was such a monumental, personal experience, I wanted to keep it all to myself.

Has that ever happened to you? Have you travelled to a new place and had such an amazing experience that you want to hold on the magic for as long as you can? You want to cherish all the memories over and over but only you, because sharing would mean sharing the magic too?

Tell me in the comments below. I would love to hear some of your favourite travel memories and experiences and if you were never the same for it. 

#WeekendCoffeeShare is an awesome link-up where coffee is being shared over great conversations. Join in this week’s fun here.

Photo By Vernette Superville

It’s time for another Five Minute Friday link-up and the word prompt this week is WORTHI will admit, when I saw this week’s prompt I was a little intimidated. I have been finding, when I only have five minutes to write, what comes up is usually stuff I that I would never tell another soul.

The minute I saw the word “WORTH” I knew that what would come up would be some deep seated personal insecurities. So I delayed in sitting down to write. I managed to spend the entire day successfully avoiding thinking about the word. But I have this commitment to write every day this month so I have to get into it. So here goes.

You can join in too. The rules are pretty simple – write for 5 minutes on the word prompt for the week and post to your blog, then add your post to the linky party over at the Five Minute Friday community.

Setting timer now…


I was chatting with a friend on Wednesday evening and we got to talking about travel. He wanted to know how I did the solo travel thing so well. And I told him, because it was worth it. Solo travel is probably the best way to get to know yourself.

Like I always suspected that I was kinda awesome, but I didn’t really know just how awesome I really was, until I got lost in a city I didn’t know and had to find my own way back to my hotel. Not once, not twice…

Good times I tell you.

Of course, when I said this to him I was more than half joking.

My secret? I really wasn’t joking. I actually do think that I pretty awesome. Some of the time.

Not always.

Sometimes, I hover somewhere between this is enough, I am enough and whose life is this anyway?

Is this okay?


Today’s post is brought to you by a rocking soundtrack as I prepared to write this by  Sinach no shame that I needed to remind myself of exactly who I am and who I belong to.  

Full disclosure: I sat staring into space after I wrote that last line and the timer buzzed me out of my reverie. I suppose it’s just as well, because I have no clue where this post was headed.

To Do List, Do What You Say You're Going To Do

I am so ashamed.

Yesterday I published a post that was incomplete, just so that I could say, I hit “publish”. I will admit, I was tired and the day’s errands got the better of me. So by the time I sat down to get my post together, I could barely keep my eyes open.

I sorta started writing it and it wasn’t flowing and I was like eff it I will publish as is and come back later and do some edits. Which I did. But I don’t feel good about it. I think that if you’re going to do anything, you don’t half ass it, you use your whole ass.

For the record I really wanted to substitute the actual cuss words for the word cuss, as I have been doing in my posts lately. But as I have learned while driving in my island paradise home of Trinidad &Tobago, sometimes the only thing to make you feel better after a bad drive, is a loud and very satisfying FFFF!!!

But I digress.

Do What You Say You’re Going To Do

So, I was delinquent with my coffee share post yesterday. To make up for it, I decided to read all of the posts in the #weekendcoffeeshare link-up aaaand leave a meaningful comment on each post.  I’m 19 for 19 at the moment. I feel mighty proud of myself too.

Tough work, this reading 19 blogs and leaving a meaningful comment. I’m having a cuppa while I’m doing it, just to make the “work” lighter. The great thing about sharing over coffee, is the snap shot you get into the lives of other people all around the world. You cannot beat this blogging community for that. And I love it.

Always Follow Through No Matter What

Today’s commitment to reading and commenting on all the blogs in the link-up taught me a little bit about myself. I honestly wanted to give up mid-way. 19 blogs to read and comment on…is a lot of blogs and a lot of comments. And I mean, who would know if I just hit “like” and kept it moving? Who would know about my little commitment to read all the blogs, right?

Follow through. That’s what kept me going. I would know that I made a promise to myself and didn’t keep it. And if I could compromise on this little thing, I’m leaving myself open for bigger compromises. Always follow through. Don’t do it some of the time. Or when it feels good or is convenient. Always.Do.It.

So my friends, do exactly what you say you’re going to do. Every time, without fail. You’ll be happier for it.