Photo By Vernette Superville

It’s time for another Five Minute Friday link-up and the word prompt this week is WORTHI will admit, when I saw this week’s prompt I was a little intimidated. I have been finding, when I only have five minutes to write, what comes up is usually stuff I that I would never tell another soul.

The minute I saw the word “WORTH” I knew that what would come up would be some deep seated personal insecurities. So I delayed in sitting down to write. I managed to spend the entire day successfully avoiding thinking about the word. But I have this commitment to write every day this month so I have to get into it. So here goes.

You can join in too. The rules are pretty simple – write for 5 minutes on the word prompt for the week and post to your blog, then add your post to the linky party over at the Five Minute Friday community.

Setting timer now…

GO

I was chatting with a friend on Wednesday evening and we got to talking about travel. He wanted to know how I did the solo travel thing so well. And I told him, because it was worth it. Solo travel is probably the best way to get to know yourself.

Like I always suspected that I was kinda awesome, but I didn’t really know just how awesome I really was, until I got lost in a city I didn’t know and had to find my own way back to my hotel. Not once, not twice…

Good times I tell you.

Of course, when I said this to him I was more than half joking.

My secret? I really wasn’t joking. I actually do think that I pretty awesome. Some of the time.

Not always.

Sometimes, I hover somewhere between this is enough, I am enough and whose life is this anyway?

Is this okay?

STOP

Today’s post is brought to you by a rocking soundtrack as I prepared to write this by  Sinach no shame that I needed to remind myself of exactly who I am and who I belong to.  

Full disclosure: I sat staring into space after I wrote that last line and the timer buzzed me out of my reverie. I suppose it’s just as well, because I have no clue where this post was headed.

I’ve learnt that:

  •  Alone is not a four-letter word, neither is Single.
  • I am intense and that’s okay. I love hard. I am passionate about the things that move me. My family comes first – my blood and the family I chose, my Cohort Of Awesome. This is me.
  • I can eat Tiramisu for the rest of my life and never get tired and I really want someone to fund this challenge. Aioli…I’m looking at you.  
  • Sushi and wine is a thing. My thing.
  • Knowing my Love Language has helped me unpack some of the baggage I’ve been carrying around. My Love Language: Quality Time and Words of Affirmation…Translation: Friendship and Encouragement/Appreciation.
  • Bejeweled Blitz and Scrabble on FB are my guilty pleasures.
  • I am a hypocrite on Thursday nights…well that will resume from September 25th anyway.
  • It doesn’t matter whether Brazil ever manages to give another football team 10 goals in a World Cup Semi-final in the future…I will have to find a way explain to my future children about the debacle of 2014 – which will be talked about until Jesus comes back for His world – and why mummy still supports that side.
  • I am still capable of throwing tantrums…foot stomping included.
  • I’m a hardcore pluviophile and that’s okay.
  • Time doesn’t heal all things. In fact in some cases, time makes things worse. When it comes to conflict resolution time can cause a wound to fester. You have to work at resolution and reconciliation, not winning. If there is a winner…there has to be loser. And this life is too short for that kinda drama.
  • Grief has revealed who I really am.
  • Adulthood is a freaking trap and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I shoulda put my foot down in 6th Form and stayed there.
  • I will never have a thigh gap and that’s okay.
  • I don’t wear my heart on my sleeve…except for those I love. Then you have it forever.
  • I love long lists and I cannot lie.
  • Failure is always an option. I have made a shitload of bad decisions in love, in business…in life. And that’s okay. Because every day I open my eyes and find myself in the land of the living…I get to try again.
  • I am no longer a girl. I am fantastically and supremely woman. I honour this body and all its imperfect beauty. I am thankful for all the experiences that brought me to this very moment. I embrace all that I am because I know that I am the product of “a thousand loves.”
  • My power is in the present. This is all I have.
  • I cannot live without books. I cannot live without blogs (my favs at least). Reading, learning and growing is like oxygen to me.
  • You become who you surround yourself with. Choose well.
  • I don’t need to try something new every day to be fulfilled. Living in fear every single day is not how I want to live my life. Overcoming my fears…one at a time works for me. The little so-called mundane things I do everyday…makes for a great life if I do them well. Those in-between moments are just as poignant.
  • The more I love for the simplest of reasons, the more reasons there are to love: Myself, my family, rain, tiramisu…the colour red…everything.
  • I have this one life. This one chance to do things my way…not the cheapest way, the most popular way or the way someone else thinks I should.
  • My happiness is a full-time job and every day I commit to cultivating a heart full of joy, wonder, love and gratitude.
  • These are my core values: Contribution. Growth. Authenticity. Excitement. Loyalty. Family. Passion.
  • “No” is essential to my peace of mind. It is the foundation I build all my “Yeses” on.
  • I make time for that which is important to me, this goes for my goals, items on my Life List and my relationships. If I say something is important, but I’m not making time for it…something has to change.
  • And speaking of change…Nothing changes, if nothing changes. There is a popular quote that describes insanity as doing the same thing over and over expecting to get different results. If I want something different for myself, I have to change the way I do things.
  • I own my crazy. I own my reality…because the one I’m living is the one I chose.
  • Life is too short for holding on to grudges. “Grudges are for those who insist that they are owed something.” I have big-girl Jedi panties for this specific reason. “Forgiveness is for those who are confident enough to stand on their own two feet and move on.”
  • Every single day I work on becoming the person I love. This one precious life I have is a living, breathing reflection of my dynamic self.
  • My glass is full. Be it wine, water, tea, or coffee. My glass is full. Not half full or half empty. Full. And it is up to me to ensure that it stays that way.
  • Miracles are only obvious in hindsight. And the fact that I’m still here, still writing, still loving, still growing it the most fantastic one of all.